Turkish Delight

I know at this point in time, you’ve begun to think to yourself, “Geez, Dayna! Did you like anything about Europe?” Yes. Yes, I did. It was a little place called Turkey. I adored it. It was hot as hell, but beautiful and fascinating.

The photo above was taken before we set off on our excursion of Kusadasi. Please note my skin color…porcelain. I like to keep it that way. I’ve never been tan in my life and when I do try to get some sun I just turn different shades of red. Worthless. This fun little fact will be important as you continue to read.

We started our day in Ephesus, a city where only 10% of the ruins have been uncovered. I think I enjoyed this day because I had a full night sleep in a real bed and a shower. Well, “shower.” We’ve discussed the fact that I was about 2 feet too tall for the shower, but I digress. It was an amazing city and I truly enjoyed my time there…except for the lady who let off an SBD in an enclosed area. WHO DOES THAT? This was also the point in time when my face melted right off.

Following this tour you are led to a small Bazaar, where the shopkeepers swarm you. They scream out “Special deal. Special deal.” Right. What am I going to do with three Turkish rugs for 20 dollars? I’m out.

One of my travel companions did indulge in some Turkish Delight. I was SO excited for this. I kept thinking, “Finally. Finally I’ll know why Edmund would sell out his sister and Mr. Tumnus to The White Witch.” I’m here to tell you that Edmund, from The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe was in fact a toolbag. He sold his sister and a little fawn out for a hard jelly-like, powdered covered, not that flavorful candy. Tool. Bag. I didn’t hate it, but I wouldn’t sell out a family member for it. Maybe a Sour Patch Kid. 

I decided to save my money for the small Bazaar we would visit before boarding the ship. I spent a small fortune of lanterns, and bowls, and jewelry. Now, I don’t consider myself a feminist by any stretch of the imagination, but I think I was kind-of-sort-of offended by the following exchange…

As I walked down one of the streets with a travel companion, shop keepers where screaming out, “Come to my shop! I make you special deal.” I was over being there and didn’t turn to look. That’s when I hear…

Shop Keeper: She’s pretty. How many camels you want for her?

Travel Companion: I kind of like her and I don’t need any camels, I think I'll keep her.

Me: Oh. My. Gosh. Is he talking about me?!?

Travel Companion: Yeah. Just keep walking.

Shop Keeper: I give you camels for her.

Me: Awkward laughter (as I keep walking)

Shop Keeper: Oh. I see. You’re an angry American. You’re like Angelina Jolie with your white skin.

Really? Really? A camel? Those things are dirty and they spit! REALLY? Oh and really? You’re going to bring up my white skin. REALLY?

This of course turned into a conversation at dinner that night.

Travel Companion 1: You are like Casper the Friendly Ghost. I mean honestly, one of the whitest women I’ve ever seen. Like you take white to a new level.

Me: Whatever. I think I’m worth at least 10 camels, by the way.

Travel Companion 2: Dayna, don’t sell yourself short. You would go for at least 15.

Me: Wow. Thanks. Stop talking.

Later in the week I received an email from a friend in the states saying she would pay at least two camels for me. What the hell? And lets be honest…I’m worth a lion. The king of the jungle and I are equals.